One Small Thing
Who needs a Valentine when you can love yourself?
Hello there,
Who needs a Valentine when you can love yourself?
Are you struggling with finding the right balance between work and personal life? Look no further! I am excited to announce that I am gifting my online course, "Getting a Balanced Life," to all of my newsletter subscribers as a Valentine’s gift to yourself.
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Understanding your current position enables you to identify areas for improvement and make meaningful changes. This coaching tool is versatile and applicable to various aspects of your life. I provide practical examples that illustrate its application in different situations.
💌Valentine’s Gift to Yourself
Why not treat yourself to a valentine’s gift that will have a lasting impact? Instead of roses or chocolates, invest in your personal growth and well-being.
Let’s prioritise self-love and personal growth this year. Join me on this transformative journey towards a more balanced life. And of course, if you have a friend who would like to have the course too, then you can share the Midlife Change Maker by clicking the button below and encourage them to subscribe.
This week I posted a video on LinkedIn all about self limiting beliefs and in particular one that held me back for years.
This is the text of my words, if you do not want to watch the video. I promise I stop pulling that hideous face very quickly!
"So today I thought I'd talk to you about self limiting beliefs. I don't know about you, but I've had quite a few of these in the past, which have held me back from doing things that I really wanted to do. When I was about 14, I was called up to go and speak to the art teacher because we were all choosing our options at school.
And my bum had barely touched the seat. When she asked me a pretty loaded question, which went along the lines of, "you're not thinking of doing art o'level, are you Lucinda?" Well, I'd already thought about this and I'd got my answer. It was a really easy, no, I'm not because I'm going to do German instead, but what followed that, her next comment sewed seed in my brain that I believed for years and years and years after that, and it really held me back from doing things. So what she said to me was " that's good because you're not creative enough to get a good grade at art o level. So it's a good job. You're not going to do it." What I heard was you're not creative. And I believed that for a long, long time afterwards. And I did what people commonly do with self limiting beliefs is that they look for reasons to reinforce what they believe. So if anybody else mentioned anything like that to me at all, I'd go, oh yeah, well that, just proves it.
It means that I'm not creative enough. I can't do these things. So when an ex boyfriend told me that he didn't think I would be an entrepreneur or be able to have a business because I wasn't creative enough, I believed him.
The other thing that people commonly do when they have self limiting beliefs, is that they start to ignore any evidence that might actually refute the fact that the thing that they believe really firmly isn't true. So even though I would do creative things like decorate a cake, or I might knit, or I might do something that we would say is creative.
I would discount it as being a practical thing, but it didn't mean I was creative at all. I was just following some instructions. And I would just push it to one side and carried on with my belief that I wasn't very creative. And then, when I was in my forties and I'd started to really question what I wanted to do, where I wanted to be, and was trying to do new things that I hadn't done before I signed up for an evening class doing mixed media. Um, and it was stuff I'd never, ever done before and all the things that I'd missed out on doing at school by choosing German, instead of doing art. And I loved it.
And I realised over the course of a few weeks during this course, that I actually was quite creative after all. And there were lots of things that I could do if I turned my mind to it. And, um, just tried. And it unlocked this thing in my brain that said, you're going to try all of these creative things from now on.
And I did so many things. One after the other, in fact, I've got an embarrassment of craft supplies upstairs in my house, and I still like to do things. I still like to knit, I still like to sew, and I still like to tap into that creativity. And I found when I actually set my own business up, that that creative thinking really helps in so many ways.
And it helps me to solve problems in so many ways. I had always just relied on my problem solving skills as being black or white, pros and cons, thinking my way around things, rather than letting any creativity in. So that self limiting belief for me, I've managed to kick it into touch. And I've managed to embrace the fact that it's not true.
So what kind of things hold you back? Have you got any self limiting beliefs hiding away in there? Can you think of what they are?
Sometimes it can be helpful to talk to another person like a coach. They can help you uncover those self limiting beliefs and help you to reframe how you think about things. And then you might find that there's a whole world of opportunities out there that you haven't tapped into yet. If you'd like to talk to me about any of those things, please book a call with me.
My Calendly link just below or in my bio."
So what kind of things hold you back? Have you got any self limiting beliefs hiding away in there? Can you think of what they are?
Self limiting beliefs are the villains that hold you back from trying new things and venturing outside your comfort zone. I would love to know what you believe about yourself that might not be true... Let me know in the comments.
Something else to read...
"The hidden rules that determine which friendships matter to us"
Robin Dunbar
Prefer audio? Then check this out...
"Jennifer Clement on women, art, creativity & why we love Frida Kahlo"
The Shift with Sam Baker
I loved this episode. The bit where Jennifer encouraged us to remember who you were, like when you were a little girl, made me want to play outside and ride my bike as fast as I can, with the wind in my hair like in the 1970s and ‘80’s (no safety helmet on or worrying about traffic in our road).
Coaching Prompt
"What do you believe that might not be true?"
Think about the self limiting beliefs that you hold dear. I want you to challenge them and see if you can find the evidence to uncover the truth.
3 songs long
And yes, this week we have Flowers by Miley Cyrus.
I chose 3 songs for the playlist because it lasts for 10 minutes (ish). That 10 minutes is the perfect length of time for you to either listen, relax, do an exercise snack, walk round the block, or do anything you fancy to music (go wild with your imagination). You can listen to my playlist or make one of your own.
That's it for this week. I would love to know how you get on with the mini course. If you would like to explore more of my online courses you can find them on my website here.
Love from,
Lucinda x
P.S.
What else?
To find out more about working with me, book a no obligation call. There is no charge, just an exchange of our time. I would love to hear from you. Book here.